It's been a really really long time since I felt like I could write here. But I can't not share this small thing:
I had this experience after an intense day of play where it really hit me hard how profoundly amazing and different my life is because of BDSM and kink. We were pulling out of the parking garage and saw these two random neighbors walking into the elevator carrying groceries or something, and I had this sense and understanding that they... just a few feet from us... wouldn't know what we do or who we are even if we were standing right next to them.
It was like I suddenly realized that I have a secret life, secret powers, this secret source of happiness and meaning... things that regular people like those neighbors don't see, and don't know. And it's not that I'm hiding it out of fear or shame. It's more like... if I ever tried to tell them, I know they wouldn't understand. It was tickling all kinds of childhood fantasies of discovering you have magic powers, or could fly, or things like that. I sat there and watched these neighbors get into the elevator and I felt like that had become reality: I'm different. We're different. We have something special and magical.
I made a joke to my Sir... something like "look at all the Muggles!" and we both laughed, but I mean it seriously. :) I feel like I'm part of a hidden world, and it feels like belonging.
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